Ukrainian Shepherd claims it's the nightly sex
Hey Folks -
Isn't it a Queen song that asks, "Who wants to live forever?" Well, Tomoji Tanabe does. I bet he was never in a rock-n-roll band !!! Bet he never read Gulliver's Travels either:
Japanese teetotaller named world's oldest man at 111
Mon Jun 18
TOKYO (Reuters) - An 111-year-old Japanese just named the world's oldest man said he owed his longevity to steering clear of alcohol.
"I don't drink alcohol -- that is the biggest reason for my good health," Tomoji Tanabe told reporters on Monday. He also told media he does not smoke and likes a glass of milk a day.
Asked how much longer he wanted to live, the besuited Tanabe, a former local government worker, said simply: "I don't want to die."
Tanabe, who lives with his 66-year-old son and the son's wife in Miyakonojo, about 900 km (560 miles) southwest of Tokyo on the island of Kyushu, met the city's mayor to receive a certificate from the Guinness Book of World Records recognizing him as the oldest man.
But he has some years to go to equal his female compatriot Yone Minagawa, 114, who is listed by Guinness as the world's oldest person and also lives in Kyushu.
A former shepherd in Ukraine, Hyrhory Nestor, also claims that title, saying he celebrated his 116th birthday in March.
The Japanese are among the world's longest-lived people, with 28,395 people aged 100 or above in Japan at the end of September last year, according to the Health Ministry. Researchers have attributed the phenomenon to factors including healthy diet and tight-knit communities.
If you ask someone why they died young, they say nothing - a much wiser explanation than those usually extracted from those achieving super-age.
So, how long before Tomoji's testimonial appears in "The Watchtower" or in MADD pamphlets exhorting temperance? Hell, I bet Tomoji never ate Twinkies, shredded wheat, or oatmeal either, but do we have anyone organizing Mad Mothers Against Oatmeal ??
I bet he never drank Ovaltine either!!
Just because he's old doen't mean he knows why he got there; and it shouldn't be assumed that it's a good thing that he IS there - as Freddie Mercury and Jonathan Swift have pointed out (and as his aged children may have thought as well).
Henny Youngman once said that he'd read a book claiming alcohol was a health threat and that he should give it up! Then he thought of his mother who had lived to the age of 93. She had enjoyed a pint of whisky every day of her life.
So, he quit reading.
I don't figure on living long enough to get my mug on Willard Scott's Smucker Show for Centenarians so I can claim my longevity's the result of worshiping Baal, regular use of marijuana, monthly ingestion of gravel, and obsessive thumb-sucking.
Since that opportunity is unlikely, I'm putting my hope in the Ukrainian shepherd and his sheep.
- Uke Man
Isn't it a Queen song that asks, "Who wants to live forever?" Well, Tomoji Tanabe does. I bet he was never in a rock-n-roll band !!! Bet he never read Gulliver's Travels either:
Japanese teetotaller named world's oldest man at 111
Mon Jun 18
TOKYO (Reuters) - An 111-year-old Japanese just named the world's oldest man said he owed his longevity to steering clear of alcohol.
"I don't drink alcohol -- that is the biggest reason for my good health," Tomoji Tanabe told reporters on Monday. He also told media he does not smoke and likes a glass of milk a day.
Asked how much longer he wanted to live, the besuited Tanabe, a former local government worker, said simply: "I don't want to die."
Tanabe, who lives with his 66-year-old son and the son's wife in Miyakonojo, about 900 km (560 miles) southwest of Tokyo on the island of Kyushu, met the city's mayor to receive a certificate from the Guinness Book of World Records recognizing him as the oldest man.
But he has some years to go to equal his female compatriot Yone Minagawa, 114, who is listed by Guinness as the world's oldest person and also lives in Kyushu.
A former shepherd in Ukraine, Hyrhory Nestor, also claims that title, saying he celebrated his 116th birthday in March.
The Japanese are among the world's longest-lived people, with 28,395 people aged 100 or above in Japan at the end of September last year, according to the Health Ministry. Researchers have attributed the phenomenon to factors including healthy diet and tight-knit communities.
If you ask someone why they died young, they say nothing - a much wiser explanation than those usually extracted from those achieving super-age.
So, how long before Tomoji's testimonial appears in "The Watchtower" or in MADD pamphlets exhorting temperance? Hell, I bet Tomoji never ate Twinkies, shredded wheat, or oatmeal either, but do we have anyone organizing Mad Mothers Against Oatmeal ??
I bet he never drank Ovaltine either!!
Just because he's old doen't mean he knows why he got there; and it shouldn't be assumed that it's a good thing that he IS there - as Freddie Mercury and Jonathan Swift have pointed out (and as his aged children may have thought as well).
Henny Youngman once said that he'd read a book claiming alcohol was a health threat and that he should give it up! Then he thought of his mother who had lived to the age of 93. She had enjoyed a pint of whisky every day of her life.
So, he quit reading.
I don't figure on living long enough to get my mug on Willard Scott's Smucker Show for Centenarians so I can claim my longevity's the result of worshiping Baal, regular use of marijuana, monthly ingestion of gravel, and obsessive thumb-sucking.
Since that opportunity is unlikely, I'm putting my hope in the Ukrainian shepherd and his sheep.
- Uke Man
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