WAL-MART #1 

The Wealthy and the Flat Earth Society

Hey Folks!!
There are a number of things that are certain and perfectly clear when it comes to Bush & Co.’s plans for Social Security:

(1) The plans are not designed to address the purported “problem.” The problem (years down the road) is supposed to be lack of funding, but the Bush plan COSTS money and increases the deficit.

(2) The only people who will be better off as a result of the plan are Wall Street folks who are already doing just fine, thank you. It has been openly admitted that retirees’ benefits will be reduced and that the stock investments “probably” will bring everything up to where it would have been in the first place – probably. But it IS certain that the invisible hand of the (stock) Market WILL be greased generously REGARDLESS of whether the plan brings Grandpa up to where he would have been in the first place. It is perfectly clear who has a sure thing and who is supposed to gamble. Those who will be forced to gamble can afford it least and those with a sure thing are least in need of it.

(3) Rich “conservatives” have hated Social Security since its inception. Their desire to “save” it via the stock market is as legitimate as their desire to “save” urban education via “vouchers” and “No Child Left Behind.” When the country was formed, one wealthy founding father said it should be run by the people who “owned it.” Later, our “betters” resented the invention of national parks because people who didn’t own the land could enjoy it. They were against women getting the vote. They were for Jim Crow. They call public education an evil monopoly. They give seminars to businesses on how to send decent-paying jobs overseas to impoverished foreign workers. They want to drill for oil in wilderness areas. They sanction torture. They rant against universal health care and even connive to reduce the level of what presently exists. They love WAL-MART and hate unions, BUT they really, really, really DO want to ensure a bountiful retirement for workers – really (well, probably).
All this, as I’ve said, is most certain and clear. There are, just as certainly, people out there who would deny this, but they are either wealthy ginks or long-standing members of The Flat Earth Society.

Lyrics from the title song of the new CD under construction

Eldorado

I’m just drivin’ around in my 1984 beat-up Cadillac -
It’s almost as beat up as me.

I’m just drivin’ all around town in my old Cadillac –
I’m goin’ to Eldorado, and I ain’t lookin’ back.

Just drivin’ around in my Caddy,
My cat, myself, and I, and Daddy.
Just drivin’ around in my car –
Gonna win the lottery – gonna be a star.

Have you seen the hills that they must climb in the Olympic marathon?
I couldn’t even walk up one of them.

But I won’t have no hills to climb when I finally arrive –
When I finally arrive in New York City.

Just drivin’ all around in New York City,
Dad, myself, and I, and Kitty.
Through the Mountains of the Moon & the Valley of the Shadow,
Makin’ my way to Eldorado.

Solo

Just drivin’ around in my Caddy,
My cat, myself, and I, and Daddy.
Just drivin’ around in my car –
Gonna win the lottery – gonna be a star.


Have you seen the hills that folks must climb who live in New York City?
I couldn’t even crawl up one of them.

But I won’t have no hills to climb when I finally arrive –
When I finally arrive in New York City.


Just drivin’ around in New York City,
Dad, myself, and I, and Kitty.

Just drivin’ around in my auto
Through the Mountains of the Moon & the Valley of the Shadow,
Just makin’ my way to Eldorado.
Gonna be a star – - - gonna I hit the lotto.

Tours???

Hey!
Just a note that PERHAPS an east coast tour and a UK tour will occur within a year or so!!
More if and when.
Yours - Uke Man

Inaugural Speech - Early Draft

WASHINGTON (UMP*) -- The following is the text of President Bush's inaugural address Thursday:
---
Vice President Snarley, Mr. Chief In-Justice, President Peanut, Daddy, Evil President Clinton, flaccid members of Congress, reverend clergy-clowns, disguised guests, and fellow fascists:
On this day, prescribed by law and marked by ceremony, I am determined to repeat the oath that Vice President Cheney uttered on the floor of the senate a while ago; so get out the Vaseline.
There is only one force of history that can break the reign of hatred and resentment, and expose the pretensions of tyrants, and reward the hopes of the decent and tolerant, but we’re certainly not dumb enough to tell you what THAT is. I may be a brain-dead slacker, but I got smart advisors.
We are led, by events and common sense, to one conclusion: The survival of liberty in our land increasingly depends on the success of large corporations undercutting domestic labor by exploiting other lands. America's vital interests AND our deepest beliefs are now ONE: screw the people!!
From the day of our founding, we have proclaimed that every man and woman on this earth has rights, and dignity, and matchless value, but that some have more rights, and dignity, and matchless value than others.
So it is the policy of the United States to seek and support the growth of democracy in any nation that won’t kiss our ass.
We will persistently clarify the choice before every ruler and every nation: The moral choice between oppressing their people for their personal gain, or letting us do it!
The American people will not pretend that jailed dissidents prefer their chains (But I will!), or that women welcome humiliation and servitude (but I will), or that any human beings aspire to live at the mercy of bullies (but as long as I am president, I WILL!).
Today, I speak to the people of America and the people of the world: “You’re fucked!”
Democratic reformers here at home, facing repression, prison, or exile should know this: I see you , Mr. Fitrakis! You dipsticks should know that we believe as Abraham Lincoln did: "You can fool some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time, and those are pretty good odds."
I ask our youngest citizens to believe me rather than their lying eyes. They should see that life is fragile, and evil is real, and courage triumphs – it’s a cake-walk, a slam-dunk. Make the choice to serve in a cause larger than you and in your days you will add not just to the wealth of the military-industrial complex, but also experience a wonderful entry-level financial opportunity for yourself.
America has need of idealism and courage because we have essential work at home, the unfinished work of reestablishing the aristocracy.
We will give our fellow Americans greater freedom to want and to fear. You may disagree with me, but I’m resolute, and you know where I stand.
When the Declaration of Independence was first read in public and the Liberty Bell was sounded in celebration, a witness said, "It rang as if it meant something." In our time it means something too:
America, in this young century, proclaims empire throughout all the world, and dominion over all the inhabitants thereof. Renewed by our mandate, fortified by God, we are ready for the greatest imposition by the few upon the many in the history of the world.
May God bless 41 and Bar and the kids, and Laura, and Condi, and Dickey, and Rummy, and Carl, and Wolfie, and fuck everybody else, especially Sponge Bob Square Pants and those Teletubbies.

* UMP - "Uke Man Press"

Jan. 21 Little Brother's

Hey Folks!!
Friday, January 21, at Little Brother’s, 1100 N. High Street, I’ll be part of the Counter Inauguration Ball. Music from 6:15 until 2:00. Two speakers. Food!! And, best of all, Lefties!!!
See you there!!!
Ukulele Man

an open Letter to the Democrats / cc to Philip Terzian et.al.

In some circles the conventional wisdom regarding the Democratic party following the 2004 election goes like this: it is too liberal, and (as Philip Terzian, associate editor of The Providence [R.I.] Journal wrote) “the hard-line, left-wing, anti-war, feminist, affirmative-action, abortion factions that dominate the Democratic Party have caused it nothing but grief.” Apparently what Democrats should do – according to these birds – is become soft centrists or hard-line rightists; pro-war, patriarchal, Jim Crow, right-to-lifers. Cow-towing to evangelical hypocrites would, supposedly, be advantageous as well.
Now the erudite crowd holding this position would certainly cry foul and claim I’ve mischaracterized them, but what else is new? It is crystal clear (as that old liberal [by today’s standards] Richard Nixon used to say) that these ginks think the Democrats lost because they weren’t Republican enough and that for Democrats to win they have to stop working for the people and start duping the people a la W & Co.
Well, just the facts, ma’am.
On one level their argument is ludicrous: the Republicans skillfully exploited prejudice against gays, immigrants, and foreigners; promulgated fantastic fears of relatively unthreatening “evil doers”; lied about all sorts of “plans” they had to help the world; translated an attack on New York and Washington by reactionary religious terrorists into an excuse to wage an unrelated war they had been planning for years; and the Democrats’ problem – supposedly - was that they chose not to behave similarly – something which, apparently, they must do now to ever have any chance of success.
I said it was ludicrous, and it is - to anyone who sees the goal of government as serving the people.
On the other hand, the argument makes sense if both parties’ goal is to rule over, rather than serve, the people. Obviously, the Republicans were much better at manipulating the voters, and the easiest way for the Democrats to replace them (and I think Machiavelli would agree) is to beat the R’s at their own game. Fuck the people.
What a sad state of affairs. Hardly anyone is calling for courage or heroism or steadfast resistance to venal self-promotion. No, instead the Democrats are letting themselves be criticized as foolish for whatever weak, half-hearted resistance they occasionally present.
What the Democratic party must do is turn its attention to helping the vast majority of Americans live a decent life: a decent job, a livable wage, health care, and a secure retirement. Let the Republicans continue helping the minority that makes $200,000 and more a year. Let the Democrats help the people have a decent life.
If the Democrats can help us find the hope and means to better feed, clothe, house, and care for the health of our families; and to feel more secure about our parents’ – and our own – retirement, then the Republicans will no longer be a majority representing a minority, but what they truly are, a minority pushing the prerogatives of a minority.
Those who suggest cloning Democrats from Republican stem cells understand and respect power but are hypocrites when it comes to the vaunted notions of what America supposedly stands for. Come the revolution, we’ll have to fix that.

The American Nightmare - Guest Column "Circleville Herald"

When was the last time you heard a religious leader say, “Money is the root of all evil”? When I was young, long ago, I heard it all the time, but I can’t remember when I last heard it said; neither can anyone else I’ve asked.
Why is that, do you think?
What I’ve been hearing for some time now is that becoming rich is “the American Dream.” Even the leader of formerly communist (now capitalist) China has joined the chorus declaring, “It is good to be rich.”
In the early days of European banking, loaning money at any rate of interest was seen by Christians as sinful; hence, the term “usury,” connoting an unfair and despicable exploitation of others. Today, the term has softened and means an “exorbitant rate or amount of interest.”
Even with that, the term is seldom heard since now almost no level of interest is considered too high. Consider the high interest many must pay on credit card debt, and if rates paid to “check cashing” and “rent-to-own” businesses aren’t exorbitant, what is? It is not good to be poor; and though it was sinful once to become rich at the expense of others, things are different now: it seems it is good to be rich, regardless.
This disconnect between the rich and working folks, between the well-off and the financially desperate, is expressed in many other ways. We hear pundits say that the rich deserve vastly larger tax cuts because they pay most of the tax, but that conveniently ignores payroll taxes. Working folks have payroll taxes taken out of every dollar they earn, up to $87,000 (an income level few workers ever achieve); a millionaire pays no payroll taxes on $913,000, but still is more “deserving” of a large tax cut than working people.
When tax cuts for the wealthy cause shortfalls in revenue, the programs that are cut to balance the budget are most often those things - like unemployment compensation, veterans services, Pell Grants, and community clinics - that serve poor and working folks. The rich get a break, the government cuts back, and those least able are asked to pay for it by doing with less – and it still doesn’t balance the budget.
It is not good to be poor.
Alan Greenspan, chairman of the Federal Reserve Board, has said publicly that the rich should keep their tax break, and instead, Grandpa and Grandma should have to work longer before retiring, pay more for their medical care, and have the quality of that care reduced.
The federal inheritance tax is constantly attacked (even though only the wealthy pay it) as is the graduated income tax (because with progressive taxation those who have more pay more). A sales tax is being pushed as a replacement (a tax approach which, far from being progressive, is actually regressive). The “benefit” of all this is that the tax burden will be shifted further from the long-suffering rich to the middle and working classes.
If you listen to the business news, you know that every time a company lays off thousands of workers, Wall Street rejoices and the stock market goes up. Every economic report over the past months bragging about our great and growing economy has been followed in a day or two by a quiet report on the lack of job creation. Sometimes, if you watched carefully, you also read that most of the new jobs that ARE being created pay MUCH less than the jobs that were lost to foreign sweatshops.
Profit trumps people. The government won’t raise the minimum wage; that would cut into profits. It insists on reducing workers’ overtime earnings (not their hours, just their earnings) to increase profits. It has sponsored business seminars on how to send workers’ jobs to foreign lands. It has taken steps to insure that a worker who runs into problems with credit card debt will have more problems declaring bankruptcy, and that well-off lenders will find it easier to hound the card holder until the end of his days (never mind that the lender had hounded many of these people into taking the card in the first place).
Over and over again it is clear to anyone who is paying attention that the goal of government and business is not to build a better life and a better nation for everyone, but to further enrich a relative few at the expense of the vast majority. How can that be if we live in a democracy of informed voters and if this is, as claimed by many, “a Christian nation”?
Well, too many voters aren’t well-informed and too many “Christians” aren’t Christian. The media exist not to inform the people but to make money. Long ago, news institutions at least claimed they had an obligation to inform. That is not even a consideration now. News, like “reality” shows, can do just about anything as long as it results in profitable ratings. The responsibility is not to the people but to the bottom line of the organization, and success there too often means playing ball with the powerful and their self-serving agenda, instead of going after deceit and corruption to protect the people.
As for Christianity, I find it difficult to believe that Jesus would ever claim, “It is good to be rich” or suggest that a tax cut for the wealthy should be paid for by the sacrifice of regular folks, much less the poor, the aged, and the infirm. I can’t imagine Jesus giving taxes much attention, period. Render unto Caesar and get on with more important considerations like how we treat the least of our brethren.
Didn’t Jesus say, “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of heaven”? Truly, it is not good to be poor, but it sounds like being rich isn’t so good either - in the long run – at least for a believing Christian who is well-informed, having read Matthew 19:24.
If getting rich IS the “American Dream,” then it is a broken dream because rich Americans are getting richer and everybody else is getting poorer. Worse, this wealth is achieved by driving the middle class into poverty and the poor into despair. In today’s world, money IS the root of all evil, and we need to be reminded of that more often.
Thoughtful Christians know that. The others better get to work developing a very, very small breed of camels.

Letter to the "Columbus Dispatch"

To the Editor,

I’m always amazed at the amount of time and energy bleeding-heart conservatives like Tom Sowell spend defending the rich and powerful. Now he’s aghast that the common people of England have recently been granted the right to “walk on certain privately owned lands” on certain “large estates.” Horrors!!! Call out the Sheriff of Nottingham!! Next they’ll be poaching his Lordship’s rabbits!!
Sowell’s spiritual ancestors also screamed bloody murder when National Parks were first created in this country. Suddenly, low people could walk on land they had neither inherited nor purchased. Sowell would have complained then as he does today: “getting something for nothing increasingly is what politics is all about.” But does being able to enjoy the natural splendor of your homeland even if you can’t buy it, build a wall around it, and keep everyone else out qualify as getting something for nothing?
Sowell’s suggestion that the Brits’ "mistreatment" of their aristocracy “provides a sneak preview of where our own liberals are headed” is laughable. By the will of evil liberals, he warns, regular folks will “find that their own little gardens can be trampled on by strangers.”
Well, we don’t have to wait until liberals get control of government to experience that brave new world; conservatives have already made sure that government agents can secretly enter our homes and tap our personal computers whenever they want, without anyone’s permission, and without having to tell us about it.
This, of course, is justifiable because – at least in their warped minds - they own us.
Yours - Tom Harker

See you at the Elvis-a-Thon at Little Brother's Sat., Jan. 8 

Letter to the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

To the Editor,
David M. Shribman, executive editor of the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, characterizes the debate over privatizing Social Security as: “two parties: one party that is more comfortable with market solutions to social problems, and another that is more comfortable with government stewardship of social programs. Or, put another way, a clash for the ages between two competing notions: personal responsibility and public responsibility.”
Sounds familiar, but it’s inaccurate.
Social Security was born of the Great Depression which, in turn, was born of the Market (remember the Crash!). Back then the “comfortable” were comfortable with letting the Market “solve” the social problems the Market had caused. Eventually, everything would be made right; if people had to sell apples on the street, that was fine with them; it was the price “we” had to pay.
Fortunately, those who cared about the large number of souls in need prevailed. Unfortunately, the few who were “more comfortable with market solutions to social problems” have been working overtime ever since to turn back the clock, and they think their time has come at last.
So, the debate is not as Mr. Shribman describes it, but rather a debate between those who would improve their own already adequate comfort at the expense of the depressed and those who would help people in need; between those who want the distressed to raise themselves by their own bootstraps but only sell them boots with no straps and those willing to offer a helping hand; between those who benefit from a system that punishes others and then blames their discomfort on the victim’s “personal responsibility” and those who recognize the need to help victims of an unjust distribution of wealth.
What’s to debate between a selfish lie and the truth?

Letter to the "Columbus Dispatch"

To the Editor,

In his Forum column Jonathan Turley claims that Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas “is neither an embarrassment nor a dolt.”
Yeah, that’s what they say about Bush too.

Yours - Tom Harker